2 Nephi 4

17Nevertheless, notwithstanding the great goodness of the Lord, in showing me his great and marvelous works, my heart exclaimeth: O wretched man that I am! Yea, my heart sorroweth because of my flesh; my soul grieveth because of mine iniquities.

18I am encompassed about, because of the temptations and the sins which do so easily beset me.

19And when I desire to rejoice, my heart groaneth because of my sins; nevertheless, I know in whom I have trusted.

20My God hath been my support; he hath led me through mine afflictions in the wilderness; and he hath preserved me upon the waters of the great deep.

21He hath filled me with his love, even unto the consuming of my flesh.
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24and angels came down and ministered unto me.
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26O then, if I have seen so great things, if the Lord in his condescension unto the children of men hath visited men in so much mercy, why should my heart weep and my soul linger in the valley of sorrow, and my flesh waste away, and my strength slacken, because of mine afflictions?

27And why should I yield to sin, because of my flesh? Yea, why should I give way to temptations, that the evil one have place in my heart to destroy my peace and afflict my soul? Why am I angry because of mine enemy?
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30Rejoice, O my heart, and cry unto the Lord, and say: O Lord, I will praise thee forever; yea, my soul will rejoice in thee, my God, and the rock of my salvation.

31O Lord, wilt thou redeem my soul? Wilt thou deliver me out of the hands of mine enemies? Wilt thou make me that I may shake at the appearance of sin?

32May the gates of hell be shut continually before me, because that my heart is broken and my spirit is contrite! O Lord, wilt thou not shut the gates of thy righteousness before me, that I may walk in the path of the low valley, that I may be strict in the plain road!

33O Lord, wilt thou encircle me around in the robe of thy righteousness! O Lord, wilt thou make a way for mine escape before mine enemies! Wilt thou make my path straight before me! Wilt thou not place a stumbling block in my way—but that thou wouldst clear my way before me, and hedge not up my way, but the ways of mine enemy.

34O Lord, I have trusted in thee, and I will trust in thee forever. I will not put my trust in the arm of flesh; for I know that cursed is he that putteth his trust in the arm of flesh. Yea, cursed is he that putteth his trust in man or maketh flesh his arm.

35Yea, I know that God will give liberally to him that asketh. Yea, my God will give me, if I bask not amiss; therefore I will lift up my voice unto thee; yea, I will cry unto thee, my God, the rock of my righteousness. Behold, my voice shall forever ascend up unto thee, my rock and mine everlasting God. Amen.
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Sometimes, other people say what we are feeling so much better than we can ourselves. Sometimes, we didn't even know we felt it.

Dinosaur Day

It was a dinosaur kind of day: on our romper, our unders, and our shirt; if only the rubber cleaning glove matched.

Bottles of Love

Kyle hasn't wanted to give Aiden his bottle in months. But he asked the other morning. Too bad, seconds after the last picture he pushed Aiden off his lap :) I wish with all my heart that he would learn how to be sweet to Aiden without mauling him. Do you think that ever happens?

Music Therapy

Evan had to work on Saturday because his boss was out of town. Luckily, they have added a cool new program on Saturday mornings---music therapy. They now have a woman with her master's in music therapy come and play instruments and sing. The residents get to play instruments too and she works with them individually. She has a magic bag of tricks that has hand drums, rattles, maracas, cow bells, cymbals, other wooden noise makers, and bells. I think that Kyle dug through to find and try every noise maker she had. It was heaven. It is now my favorite activity they do, although "mingo" is still at the top of my list.

Even Aiden has a maraca

This was to silence them and feel the vibrations

Tanner Park Picnic on a Sunday Morn

We had a baby blessing to attend with a late sacrament meeting start. So bright and early this morning at 8:30 we loaded the kids (Kyle is now sick with a fever, runny nose, cough, and gooey eyes) and a small picnic to go to Tanner Park. It was a really nice morning before we went home for pre-church naps.

"the playground, Mommy"

He did not like this at all. And I made him wait until I got a good picture of him crying

He was clawing to get to Evan

"Kyle love swinging, Mommy"

He's somewhat okay like this, with very small swinging motion, of course

"I love climbing, Mommy"

 

"I did it, Mommy"

Blessing of the Animals

Once a year, Evan's work, Silverado, does a blessing of the animals. It involves all the residents, residents' family, staff, staff family, and all their animals to come to the facility and enjoy a blessing. We gather as a community, which is actually what they call it, in the main courtyard under umbrellas and with bottles of frozen water. Nutrition makes homemade treats for the humans and homemade treats for the animals, which are mainly dogs. The Silverado chaplin blesses each animal with a non-denominational blessing and gives them a certificate, hand written at the time, and personalized to the animal.

The part that really makes the festivities to me:

The Butterfly Release

One person from each family, who has lost someone in the last year, is invited into a circle. All families who lost a member of the Silverado community within the last year are invited back for this; however, many more participate. The envelopes in the top picture are handed out. The butterflies are enclosed in those folded pieces of paper. The butterflies are symbolic of how for their weight, butterflies consume the largest amount of food. They eat and eat and eat, much like grief in the beginning of loss. Then it rest, and finally emerges beautiful. Much like grief loses it's bite over time and eventually turns into sweet memories and thoughts of those lost. All the butterflies are released together while the harp music plays in the background.

I participated for the first time this year. In honor of Briana. Although two dogs threatened to eat my butterfly, no joke, it lingered for a significant amount of time. It even nestled on my shirt before it flew away. I thought it was a symbolic remembrance that she would love.

The part that means the most to Kyle:

The Pony Rides

Kyle tells us that he rode a pink pony. Even though Aiden has been running an uncontrollable fever (Thursday night he hit 105.1) and was diagnosed with a double ear infection and eye infection in both eyes---he too had fun with the animals. Don't worry, the doctor told us he wasn't contagious and we had lots of meds and antibiotics in his system. We did not stay long both boys were cranky. But it was a gorgeous day and we all enjoyed it.

Kyle asked me to take a picture of these dogs. There were tons of dogs and both boys were in such heaven. We even petted all the dogs available for adoption. Kyle screamed bloody murder each time he was licked. He does not like that, but still loves dogs. I am not a dog lover at all, but both my boys just love them like crazy. When Aiden was holding my hands standing, a dog came over and licked his mouth, Aiden looked up at me and smiled his crazy tooth smile. He just loves them, even the licking, even the mouth licking :)