Bad Parenting

So yesterday's middle wasn't the best.....

it included:

1. a child squatting in his booster to pee in it (does great naked, has lots of accidents in his unders)
2. a child dumping his chocolate soy milk all over himself, 5 minutes after peeing, because he wasn't looking at his cup
3. burning my husband's dinner
4. tormenting my child by practicing my hair cutting techniques on him--pictures to come later.
5. Massive amounts of snot and then green goo coming from Kyle's really watery eye. Research suggests that it is pink eye--appropriate for Valentine's Day, I suppose. However, no symptoms this morning so we are not going to the doctor unless it shows up again.
6. The best part is a long explanation. Evan left for work while I was changing Aiden's diaper and getting him dressed. This involved him yelling at me that his hands were too full and could I lock the door after he left. Kyle can open the door if we don't dead bolt it and there is no other lock. I agreed and thought, "I'll do it as soon as I'm done." But then I promptly forgot. After I gave Aiden his 11 am bottle, I was changing his diaper. I heard the door open and then close. I rushed out to make sure that Kyle didn't leave. But he was playing in the living room and I figured that he had just peeked outside like he likes to do when he knows the door is open. I locked it to say the least. 6:30 came around and I was giving Aiden his next bottle, I couldn't find it. Not on the counter and not on my night stand. Not in the couch cushion. I asked Kyle to find the bottle. He said, "Bottle outside door." I was shocked. I thought for sure the bottle would be gone. I rushed to open the front door and it was sitting right there ever so nicely on our door mat. I don't know if Kyle set it there (he likes to move it from table to counter to shelf) or if the neighbors picked it up and set it there for me. Needless to say, I was relieved. Quick wash and we were back in business.