This morning

I am in the shower. I open the curtain and Kyle says immediately
Kyle: Kyle not go to timeout.
Me: What?
Kyle: Kyle plays paper, Kyle not go to timeout.
Me: Really??? Okay.
Once out of the shower and in the bedroom, I realized he had pulled files out and spread all the papers around the bedroom. Seriously! But he already told me that he wasn't going to timeout. What's a mom to do.

Later:
Me: k, cranky.
Kyle: I not cranky.
Me: Yes, you are.
Kyle (yelling at me): No, I not cranky. I happy.
Me: You're not happy cuz you're whinny.
Kyle: I not whinny. I happy.
Me: Okay, be happy.
Kyle sits down and starts to suck his thumb with monkey.

Later:
Me: Are you making me crazy?
Kyle: Me not crazy.
Me: No, you're not crazy, but are you making me crazy?
Kyle: Yes!